Editor: F Lennier. BA (hons) (Mrs)
Dear Mrs Lennier
Following the public ballot on 2 October, I have parted company with my former legal advisors, Morton Flix LLP - please ensure all future correspondence is directed to me rather than them.
I am aware that the outcome of the public ballot is said to have been your re-election as Trustee. It is nonetheless clear to me that the process undertaken in the ballot was at best flawed and perhaps subject to abuse or subversion.
I would like to point out that Dr Dawes-Burritt's presence seems to have disturbed some of the voters and may have corrupted the outcome. However, it is also clear that a large number of impoverished individuals were in some way bribed (perhaps upon information from Dr Dawes Burritt) to vote against me. Those individuals were mobilised on masse, brought to the ballot box and instructed how to vote. If that is not perversion of the democratic process I, for one, do not know what is.
It appears clear to me that I have been cheated of this election and that such behaviour is fully in keeping with the way in which this paper has been run over the last year. I have tried to rescue the paper and the trust from the current regime. However, I have failed and am left with no option but to wash my hands of the paper and the whole affair.
Miss Doreen Davies
Tilebury 'Harbinger' FAO the Editor
I wanted to write to warn people in the village. I recently purchased a spider plant which was being advertised through your Classified section. As is usual, I took care to clean the plant's leaves regularly by individually wiping each one individually. The spider plant has been growing very well and I concluded that this treatment was suitable.
For a period of time, I have been experiencing occasional abnormal dreams. These have been building in strength over the last few weeks. Upon consulting a doctor I am advised that I may have had a reaction to something on the spider plant.
Obviously I put on kitchen gloves and put the spider plant in a blender before strewing the remains in a safe corner of the garden. I do not approve of narcotics and would recommend to any other villager now in possession of one of these spider plants to do the same.
I hope this warning reaches you in time.
24 October (Scan attached to email)
I am writing to follow up on my email on behalf of the Tilebury Green Party. Since my last letter, the Tilebury Green Party has resolved its constituent membership affiliations into the Tilebury Green Alliance. Please note that only part of the Alliance is affiliated to the national Green Party.
I am consequently informing you that I no longer remain appointed executive spokesperson of the Tilebury Green Party (which no longer exists). By agreement with the other members of the alliance I am presenting their agreed position to you in this letter.
The policy of the former Tilebury Green Party to present flowers to human members of the village ecosystem who were taking a disproportionate share of the Earth's resources has the support of only some parts of the Tilebury Green Alliance. After some set-backs other members would prefer to put their efforts into other policy priorities including sowing wild-flowers in public spaces, finding third sector employment for young members of the village with a positive impact upon true sustainability and litter-picking.
The members of the Tilebury Green Alliance request that the readers and residents of Tilebury respect the purpose of the gift of flowers when they receive them and, where possible, refrain from swearing at the giver.
With thanks and esteem.
(former appointed executive spokesperson of the Tilebury Green Party (not affiliated to the national Green Party but supporting and sharing their societal platform) now interim spokesperson of the Tilebury Green Alliance).
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